Download E-books Stupid Ancient History (Stupid History) PDF

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By Leland Gregory

Best-selling stand-up comedian Leland Gregory deals a blockbuster selection of greater than 2 hundred strange, bizarre, foolish, surprising, and downright outrageous actual tales approximately historical Greek and Roman history.

New York Times best-selling writer Leland Gregory is one among Andrews McMeel Publishing’s such a lot winning noncartoon humorists. foolish, surprising, bizarre, hilariously funny—and outrageously true—the brief anecdotes within his anthologies of human stupidity are culled from print, on-line, and broadcast media from everywhere in the world. Inside Stupid old History, Gregory chronicles Greek philosophers, Roman conquerors, and old mythconceptions, including:

— To struggle off Roman ships in three hundred BC, Carthaginians catapulted dwell snakes at them.
— The Athenian lawmaker Draco died of suffocation while presents of cloaks have been showered upon him through thankful voters at an Aegina theater in 620 BC. 
— In old Rome, lengthy sooner than the arrival of the Christian Bible, Roman males swore to “tell the reality, the complete fact, and not anything however the fact” via putting their correct hand on their testicles. It is from this ritual that we derived the time period “testimony.”
—  Of the Seven Wonders of the traditional international, The Temple of Artemis in Ephesus burned to the floor in 356 BC. The arsonist used to be done; and to ensure his want for eternal repute wouldn’t come actual, it used to be ordered that his identify be afflicted from all documents and not pointed out again. But humans will talk. Despite all efforts, his identify leaked, and Herostratus is remembered as some of the most infamous firebugs in history. 

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C. through King Nebuchadnezzar for his spouse, Amyitis, who used to be homesick for the mountains of her homeland. The terraced gardens have been a few seventy-five toes excessive and coated with bushes, plant life, fountains, and waterfalls. It used to be a ask yourself for its day, yet now not a hint of the backyard exists this day. III  The Temple of Artemis at Ephesus. equipped by means of King Croesus, in Ephesus, close to sleek Selcuk, Turkey, round 550 B. C. , the temple was once thought of the main attractive constitution on the earth, made thoroughly of marble (except the roof). It featured gold pillars and 4 bronze statues of Amazons, the ladies warriors who have been Artemis’s so much devoted fans. Antipater of Sidon, who compiled the record of the Seven Wonders, describes the completed temple: i've got set eyes at the wall of lofty Babylon on that's a highway for chariots, and the statue of Zeus through the Alpheus, and the placing gardens, and the colossus of the sunlight, and the massive exertions of the excessive pyramids, and the large tomb of Mausolus; but if I observed the home of Artemis that fastened to the clouds, these different marvels misplaced their brilliancy, and that i acknowledged, ‘Lo, except Olympus, the solar by no means appeared on aught so grand. ’ (Antipater, Greek Anthology nine. fifty eight. ) The constitution was once destroyed via an arsonist named Herostratus (see his tale) in 356 B. C. It was once then rebuilt, after which burned down back by way of these pesky Goths. IV  The Statue of Zeus. The Statue of Zeus at Olympia used to be made via the Greek sculptor Phidias, ca. 432 B. C. , and erected within the Temple of Zeus in Olympia, Greece. The seated statue, a few forty-three ft tall, occupied half the width of the aisle of the temple outfitted to deal with it. “It turns out that if Zeus have been to face up,” the geographer Strabo famous early within the first century B. C. , “he could unroof the temple. ” Zeus’s physique used to be made up of ivory, and his beard, gown, and sandals have been made up of gold. His throne, additionally made up of gold, was once encrusted with useful stones. Zeus went to satisfy his maker after a hearth destroyed the statue in 462 A. D. V    The Mausoleum at Halicarnassus. equipped round 353 B. C. in Halicarnassus (present Bodrum, Turkey) by means of Queen Artemisia in loving tribute to her husband, King Mausolus, who used to be additionally her brother. it truly is unknown precisely while and the way the mausoleum got here to wreck, yet in response to Eustathius within the 12th century on his remark of the Iliad, “It was once and is a ask yourself. ” we're for this reason resulted in think that the construction was once most probably ruined, most likely through an earthquake, among this era and 1402, while the Knights of Saint John arrived (who used a number of the stones from the mausoleum to give a boost to their fortress of Bodrum). The marble that wasn’t reused for different reasons was once burned into lime. (James Fergusson, The Mausoleum at Halicarnassus Restored in Conformity with the lately came across is still, p. 10. ) in fact, the trendy be aware “mausoleum” (usually a stone development the place the our bodies of the deceased are entombed aboveground) used to be named after King Mausolus. VI  The Colossus of Rhodes. The Colossus of Rhodes was once a statue of the Greek Titan Helios erected within the island urban of Rhodes designed and built (with aid, in fact) via the nice Greek sculptor Chares of Lindos among 292 and 280 B.

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